I became a FAN in 1993, after the release of Dangerous, after listening to the songs Will You Be There and Keep the Faith. I was attracted to these songs because I was suicidal from the ages of 9-13. It's not that I didn't like life or myself but I was teased day in and day out and bullied by my peers. My teachers and other school officials didn't do anything about it and I didn't let my mother in on it because she had her own issues to deal with. My grandmother, my rock, died when I was 9. I wanted to go with her. I didn't want to face my peers, just to be teased, stared at, hit, pushed, have things thrown at me because I was physically different from them!! I didn't want to deal with that so I stopped (basically) going to school in 6th, & 7th grade. In these grades I was also suspended 2 times for defending myself.